When we think of how our various relationships began, whether romantic or not, they are often founded on something we have in common. That tends to be the launching pad for conversation. We usually connect over a shared interest or trait and from there, the conversation flows and a relationship develops.
But what happens after the “commonality dust” settles and we see how different we are? Often this can cause a rub or conflict in our relationships; an impatience for someone thinking differently or doing things differently than we would.
“All couples object to differences. And the objection to difference is not only a relational problem with couples, it is a relational problem with all human beings. We think that being different is not okay. And we see that in the polarization in our culture right now.”
– Harville Hendrix, Medium
Creativity in relationships happens when we embrace each other as individuals with unique traits, opinions, thoughts, and feelings. It’s important to recognize that these differences we have with our partners or friends are not only okay but should be celebrated. They add diversity and breathe new perspectives into our lives.
The things that make us different, which we often view as divisive in a relationship, can actually bring us closer. By being open and receptive to other viewpoints and differences, we are able to understand others (and ourselves) better.
Having healthy relationships doesn’t mean finding someone exactly like you. It means understanding that you see the world through different lenses and accept one another in spite of that. From there, a deepened connection can happen.
It’s not always easy and it will take work – but so many worthwhile things do. We challenge you to take inventory of your close relationships this week and see the beauty in your differences!